I received a note from a friend of mine that brought floods of thoughts of all the women who have been a special part of my life. I wanted to share some of those thoughts and memories and hope that you will also share some as well.
My mom Bernice... She is Thankfully still alive and healthy and she is a beautiful women inside and out.
Mom and her 8 siblings (there were 7 sisters and 2 brothers) had a rather hard life in their younger years. When I hear stories of how they were brought up, it makes me extremely thankful for all that I had growing up, and for what I have now. She taught me not to take anything for granted, never to be greedy and to be generous and appreciative with all that I have.
My Paternal Grandmother Anne (RIP)... She was the sweetest woman to walk this earth. I never once in my life heard her utter a complaint or speak badly of anyone. Who in this world can say that today? I really TRY to live my life in that image. I hate cattiness and gossip and have been the victim of both more than my share of times. So, when I find myself starting to go there... I put myself in the other persons shoes and ask myself how I would feel if I were being talked about or treated that way.
My Maternal Grandmother Bernice passed away when I was only 6, so I have few memories of her. What really stuck with me though, was that I was a little afraid and intimidated by her. I don't ever remember her showing me any affection. Not even a hug?... This unfortunately trickled down to my mom because she was never shown that type of attention in her life so, she never held me or hugged me (that I can remember) outside of when I was a baby or unless I was ill. (We just discussed this for the first time a couple of years ago. It was a very emotional conversation needless to say...) Surprisingly, as painful as this was to me, it influenced me in a positive way in the long run. I am really an affectionate person and have always loved and welcome hugs. My children were (are) drenched in my loving arms every chance I could (can) get ;)
My sister Terri... I only have one sibling. Although we love each other dearly, she and I were never close as far back as I can remember. In our adult lives we have gotten closer and have tried to help each other through tough times. She influences me most by her gifts that she has. She is extremely artistic and can design a room fit for a queen, sew anything from a square for a quilt, to beautiful window treatments, or an outfit anyone would be proud to wear. She also used to write lyrics from the heart, sing, play guitar, paint, draw, craft... You name it, she can do it. She inspired me to find my own talents.
My "Honorary Auntie" Pat. This women has shown me so much love and support throughout my life. She is a woman that should have had a dozen children, but was never able to have any. I share my family with her and am grateful that she is a part of it and an influence on my children. She has had my back on more than one occasion and I will always have hers...
The one person that was my "Sister" in every sense of the word, but by blood, was Janine. She was and will always be that best friend and soulmate. She knew everything about me and loved me no matter what. She held my deepest darkest secrets and I hers. She was my "Person."
In our teen years we had our fair share of arguments, spats and jealousy's, etc... But when it came down to it, all the important stuff that matters, she was there like no one else.
A great example of just one such occasion is the day that my life as I knew it fell apart. Within a few hours of getting my hysterical phone call that my husband was having an affair and leaving me, she was coming through my front door. This sounds like something any friend would do right? The thing is.... I lived in Naperville, IL and she was in Fortworth, Texas!!! She hung up, threw some things in a bag, told her husband she had to go, hopped on an airplane and walked into my house and took care of me and my 3 little boys until I could pull myself together enough to do it myself. No "What can I do for you?" Janine just knew, and did it.
There were many times we were there for each other like that, both for joyous occasions and sad occasions. I helped her make it through her excitement and disappointments of trying to conceive and all the fertility treatments she endured. I held her hand when she decided to leave it in Gods hands whether or not she would have a child.
She watched over me and supported me as I struggled as a single parent for many years.
We celebrated joyously as Janine stood up for me as my Maid of Honor when she was gloriously 6 months pregnant with her first child, and I was marrying my husband and love of my life Chris.
I was there in TX to welcome her new little boy Jacob.
Sadly, shortly there after..., I was there to help her husband Paul take care of her when she was collapsed with a brain tumor.
And then the hardest thing I have ever had to do in my life...
I had to help her leave this world, and me. I had to make her believe that all of us were going to be OK. That it was OK to "Rest in Gods hands." Janine died with more grace and dignity than anyone I know. I am so honored and blessed to have had a this woman in my life. It has left a huge hole in my life that I have slowly tried to fill over the past years.
To be continued....
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